Mother VS Grandmother

It’s no surprise that our babies will make us women want to be the best at everything we do for them. It’s natural instinct that allows us to nurture the right way as if we knew how to be a parent already (which we don’t)

It’s funny how grandmothers always seem to have the magic touch for everything baby. Did you notice that ?!

It’s like there’s a grandmother handbook. it’s filled with tips and tricks and advice you may want to hear and opinions you may not. Of course they are experienced because most of the time they’ve done the baby thing years ago and know how to handle certain things but isn’t it just amazing how that actually works.

In my case, my son is attached to my hip. Recently my elder sister and her man looked after him while I enjoyed a much needed night out and she told me that getting Jaden to sleep was extremely difficult because he wanted his breastmilk and mommy… mommy was nowhere to be found. Eventually he did get some sleep but it made me think the next day as she told me how difficult he was…how on earth does Jaden’s grandma & all the other grandmothers of the world do it????

I’ve gone out plenty of times and I’ve even left Jaden to go on a three day mommy-cation & from her point of view she was just like “he’s fine, he’s slept, he’s not crying or fussy.” hmmmmmm okay that’s great to hear BUT what on earth is GRANDMA doing that SISTER is not doing? that’s why I’m convinced there’s a grandmother handbook. It’s probably a secret book only available for all grandmothers lol

What I think is that with all the experience they have had in the past with countless of children, the babies themselves sense that. They sense a trust that they have with their own mothers. (Don’t worry sister 😉 I trust you with all my heart) …

They know subconsciously that this grandma is my best friend after mommy because all grandmothers spoil their grandchildren so the children are on their best behavior. Again, that’s my own personal opinion but it’s fascinating to me.

I’ve seen it with my own eyes the way Jaden’s grandmother cares for him, feeds him and bathes him… as if it was her first son. Do I take the tips she gives me yes I do but sometimes there is a line that should be drawn where the mother should be encouraged and not judged because she doing certain things her own way. After all, practice makes perfect.

This was one of struggles in the beginning. I felt like I’m was doing my best and wasn’t getting enough praises for it by Jaden’s grandmother. It was always (do it this way and do it that way) and it should have more (well done, good job) remembering this time makes me also wonder to myself why as a new mother do we seek validation from our mothers so deeply?! maybe it’s because hearing you’re doing a good job can go along way or maybe it’s because deep down, you’ve been parenting me and now I’m the parent and I need to know that I’m parenting correctly but it’s a loop whole because there is no straight line to perfect parenting.

As long as are children get educated book smart and “street smart” I believe it’s a job well done in the long run.

All in all, we just have to be thankful for our children’s grandmothers. We might not always see eye to eye but the advice is meaningful and if our little babies can feel so comfortable with how they are around them, as mothers we have to have that same confidence.

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