“You want some milk?”

Since my son was born he’s been quite the breast feeder. I’m not sure what it is that has drawn him in but I’m all for it because I believe it’s very healthy for him although it can be annoying because something I feel I am limited to wearing certain clothes just in case he’s ready to throw a fit and now I have to rush somewhere to take off what I have on.

I’ve already stated introducing Jaden to solid food which I talked about in an earlier blog. I’ve noticed that because of this food substitute he still loves his breast milk but now I can give him various food and drink items throughout the day and then towards the evenings, I give him the breastmilk. This has become my way of weening him off gradually. It’s definitely working. As long as I have the right food on me when we’re out he seems to understand that it’s not the time for breastmilk.

Now other mothers who are also breastfeeding can say, “well pump.” Sorry, that’s just not for me. . . I did love my pump in the beginning then it become a task for me, literally! I’d rather to laundry than pump milk. To each their own but I hardly use the device UNLESS I am super swollen and Jaden is around then yes I’ll use it but otherwise no.

I believe every mother has their own method for her own child & our babies have their own method of letting us know what they are ready for and what they are still wanting to stay the same. It’s really about communication. When I tell Jaden “Do you want some milk?” He literally turns around and looks at me because he knows what MILK I’m talking about. If I say “Juice” he doesn’t pay attention until I show him the juice carton and then he crawls over fast because he knows that’s the little juice box of sweet yummy goodness.

Breastfeeding is a big task whether you believe in it or not but I’m getting to that point where although I love him taking my milk, I’m over it. He’s got his teeth coming in and sometimes he thinks it’s funny to take a bite and it really hurts.

I think it’s time to put and end to it. I’m not sure how I want to go about it… where I am it’s cold so I could do the turtle necks for a week and there’s zero access, maybe he’ll get the picture but I’m definitely ready to try something.

He’s becoming a big boy and I’m also realizing as a mother, I really am the boss of him so although he might not “baby like me” for a while, he’ll get over it and I won’t feel so guilty.

What are some of your ween off methods mom’s?

Airplane tears. (Another real story)

Recently I had made the transition from West Africa to Atlanta via London. It was one of my worst flights to date I have ever been on, why? Because for the first time, I got food poisoning. Such an awful thing.

Half way through the first flight which happened to be an evening flight , Jaden was sleeping, I woke up from my own sleep feeling terrible. I felt so weak and all I could do was reach for the paper bag in front of our seat pockets and throw up inside…. not once, not twice but at least 7 times. The flight couldn’t end fast enough.

As we finally reached London, I was hit with the coldest weather I had felt since the beginning of the year. It was freezing. I felt so bad for my baby but luckily I came fully prepared for him as I should have but for myself not so lucky lol not only was I sick, I could hardly walk and I definitely wasn’t dressed warmed enough. We had the longest lay over about 7 hours and I didn’t have strength to be sick in a busy airport not know which minute I had to throw or something else so I filled out the landing card got out of the airport and luckily found a hotel in the airport that I checked myself into. . . It was the right decision.

Once we got in all I wanted to do was sleep but of course my little guy had other plans. He wanted to play and crawl all over the place, I didn’t blame him though he got enough rest as it is. I managed to get word party going but he wasn’t very interested so I just grabbed him in the bed with me and switched off all the lights hoping he’ll knock out again … NOPE. He was making all these noises knew I wasn’t getting anywhere so I decided to give him a long bubble bath which finally worked and I could finally get the much needed sleep and recovery I needed.

Fast forward to the next flight, I thought I was feeling better unfortunately I wasn’t. The captain asked me so many question if I was fit to fly but I played it off well because I just wanted to get to Atlanta. As we took off, Jaden had all the energy in the world because this unlike the last flight was an afternoon flight. I was feeling so weak I couldn’t really hold him and play with him like I do and like he loves and I think he noticed because he became so fussy. As the hours kept going by all I wanted to do was sleep and rest. No food, no drink, no walking around just sleep but my little man just didn’t want to.

About 5th-6th hour in Jaden decided to be THAT child that everyone is praying is not on the flight, THE CRY BABY! This was a first for me. He’s usually well-behaved and hardly makes a sound & he’s flown long haul flights before but this one was a different story. For two hours straight he cried & cried! Nothing I was doing was helping. His lungs kept going, his pitch kept getting higher & I felt like I was in a nightmare dream. “Please stop crying” “what do you want & need” but his little face kept going and going. Even with the fraction of energy I had I stood up briefly and he would stop but the minute I sat down he started again but I just couldn’t hold him up long.

It got to the point where I called the flight attendants and asked them to “please take my son, take him so I can sleep, 30 min” I couldn’t do it. I was about to lose my head. THANKFULLY they had spare time to help me out not just once but twice. I now know where that expression heaven-sent comes from. I just needed him off my hands and on that desperate time they came. I was so overwhelmed I believe I even cried for a moment because I was so relieved.

I remember while sleeping they tapped on my feet and I saw Jaden smiling. When they gave him back he wasn’t as fussy and would also close his own eyes briefly. There was a point where he did start-up again & two passengers helped me out. One took Jaden for an isle stroll for about 10 minutes up and down and another from his seat was silently waving to him and because of the interaction, Jaden couldn’t help but wave back over and over very soft and calmly and next thing you know he fell into a deep sleep and I followed. When I woke up at last my little guy was fully knocked out bout 1hr30 left till landing. I glanced to the passenger on the other side and said “Thank you” he smiled back.

Once we landed, I was so happy. It was the longest flight I ever took but only because I wasn’t feeling too great. Jaden was back to his normal self and it’s another first time experience that is one for the books.

The end.
On a side note:

Being a helpful stranger to a mother or any parent can be the most simple reward you can give a parent. If you ever see someone struggling even if it’s just a short while, give them a helping hand like those who helped me out. You’re doing us a kind favor and we are so grateful for it.

Keeping the Love alive.

Once you have a baby most of your attention is on your precious new bundle of joy. Of course it is, as a mother you were carrying this child for 9 months. You’ve been through the waddling and the heartburn, all of that including giving birth so at the end when you see that tiny little face it’s like *Deep breath* (I did it!!) Even for fathers, you’ve also been on your toes for 9 months, making sure your child is doing perfectly fine and is eating well and the excitement of just seeing your daughter or son is uncontainable & then you finally do it’s like *Deep breath* (there is my child) for both man and woman it’s just a love that you can not explain.

Putting precious baby to the side, it’s really important we remember our partners. Having a child is a two way street and both parents should always make an effort to keep the romance and spark alive.

I’ve already explained how it takes women sometime because we won’t feel like ourselves right away but even at that, men… you should always support your woman. Tell her she’s beautiful, tell her thank you, give her flowers or give her some foot massages or even run a bath. It’s all about the little gesture that sparks the love. Do anything that makes your woman happy, even if it’s something you don’t like to do, for her just do it because it’ll me a lot & to my women…As the mothers we do have to deal with a lot and we can get tired so quickly but we must also must not forget that our partners need love too and we can contribute to the spark by cooking his favorite meal, back massages, treating him to something he really enjoys doing and anything else that might contribute to happiness. On top of all that don’t neglect the love making. That connection and bond between two is very strong and important. Yes our children are a big distraction but intimacy is necessary. Don’t get so caught up that it forgets to happen because it will cause unnecessary tension. It’s good to release those feelings because after all, we did make a child together so as a couple it’s something to really enjoy.

Now on a truthful note, I know not everyone might not be in a relationship, and that’s perfectly alright. What’s really important is also self love. Whether you’re a single mother or a single father that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t take care of yourself. What makes you happy? What is something you have always wanted to do? Whatever those things are find time to do them. There’s a reason that nannies exist. Even if you feel like I’ve had a child and I feel great but I want to meet somebody new, well alright then spoil yourself and go out on a date… It can be anything, just make sure you don’t loose yourself.

Keeping the love alive can mean different things to all of us but it’s all about taking action and I sincerely believe that if you can keep the flame burning whether big or small everything can be a whole lot more enjoyable. Parenthood won’t be felt as burden but a blessings with amazing perks.

I’d love to read some of your own “spark methods” to keeping the love alive in your home. Feel free to share.

The Nerve. (A real story)

It’s already hard enough taking care of a baby then you have to image taking your precious baby out with you. It consists of a lot…. diapers, food, bibs, teething toys, milk and water – a never ending check list not to mention car seat and stroller (mind you I don’t have a car so everywhere I go, it’s Uber everywhere)

Shortly after giving birth I noticed that a lot of my hair was falling out. I heard this could happen. Kind of like when you loose the face glow. It was really frustrating and I got fed up with having to deal with the shedding. There was literally nothing I could do. It got to the point where I made the decision : I am going to cut my hair. How short?! Who knows but that’s all I wanted to do. I seem to be Miss research. I like to know everything before I do something. I had gone on social media every day for hours looking at all the cuts and styles I wanted and made sure I could find someone who could do the cut very well. Finally after sometime I found someone (unfortunately I forgot their name… aren’t they lucky ) I texted their number, told them what I wanted to do, sent pictures & I tried to get an appointment. After four long days of me just wanted to rip my hair out I finally got an official time and date where I could make this big change, I was looking forward to so much.

Going back to what I said at the top, it’s not always easy moving around with a baby. Once baby Jaden and I were ready to go, I called an Uber and we were in the car for almost 30 to 40 minutes. It was a long journey to the hair shop and unfortunately my apartment was no where close. I get there, I’m excited, ready to whip out my phone and show this “professional stylist” *eye roll* what I like … he walks over to me and says “Oh you have a baby, WE DON’T ALLOW BABIES WHILE YOU’RE GETTING YOU HAIR DONE.” You can already imagine the look on my face!!! I was fuming I had to take 5 minutes just to composed how angry I was! I finally asked in a harsh voice “WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T ALLOW CHILDREN? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!! MY BABY IS SLEEPING IN HIS STROLLER AND HE’S NOT GOING TO MOVE” and lastly “WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING BEFORE ALL THIS.”

I couldn’t believe what this guy was saying to me. I wish I knew more people so I could call a news crew and tell everyone how they were totally discriminating against me. I felt insulted, I felt hurt and I felt like I wasted so much of my time. I even asked to speak to the manager who wasn’t any help at all. It was at this very moment I understood why some parents really fight for their children’s rights. How can I get penalized for having a baby as if he was going to touch something and cause a ruckus. It was completely out of line and unprofessional on their part especially for not informing me before. I had even asked the guy why did you make me waste all my time especially knowing I lived far away and his stupid response was “oh sorry, I didn’t know you had a kid” and THEN to add insult to injury he had THE NERVE to say “most of my clients don’t have kids.” (Insert multiple f bombs) I had enough of this place. I literally couldn’t look at him in the face because an African palm slap was 10 seconds away. I called an Uber who luckily was close by and I left that disgraceful salon.

I’ll never forget this day. It was one of the worst new mother experiences I have had so far & I pray I don’t have to deal with it ever again or at least as little as possible. I’ve learnt my lesson that although it’s nobodies business to know if I have a child or not I’ll be sure to mention it before I make any type of appointments so I can know the policies. The happy ending of the story is I found someone to cut my hair who happily accepted having my son hang around in his stroller while it got done (if you’re ever in the Atlanta area her name is Brandy and her Salon is called IMAGE IS EVERYTHING) that’s real customer service for you.

To all the parents out there, I don’t wish you come across situations like this one, ever.

The end.

Yay!! Christmas is coming… Toys product review

I hear the sleigh bells ringing because Santa is coming to town. ‘Tis the season.

Here are a list of recommended toys that Jaden has enjoyed very much.

1. Jumperoo ($105) by Fisher price. This product is standing bouncer that is very easy to put together. It’s great because children love excitement, noise & color all in one. The more they jump. The more noise it makes and they really get into. The one Jaden has is a jungle theme with even some birds “flying” above his head. I remember when he couldn’t reach anything but now that he’s grown they are definitely at a friendly reach. The Jumperoo is also great because as the child grows, it adjust along with it.

2. Baby Einstein discover and play piano ($15.39) Whether you’re new to the baby Einstein collection or not, it’s fantastic. Most of the music that is played from the toys is classical and it’s actually not irritating like some toys. The baby piano is a toy that amuses the child as they tap down on the 6 keys. Music will play and you can also change the noises to a piano, trumpet or violin as well as a dog, cat and duck (don’t ask me why a duck) lol … another great thing about this baby piano is its changes languages to Spanish, French and English. For the future this will actually because a great learning tool especially if you’re all for a multilingual child.

3. Baby Einstein Neptune Ocean Orchestra Musical. ($17.99) Simple to use, volume adjust and it’s shaped like a cute turtle which Jaden from what I see loved. What’s great about this toy is your child can be the conductor on their own, with each press an instrument sound will go off until the whole song is composed and you hear the whole tune, pretty neat. My favorite is the “Carmen” piece. There is also an option to hear the tune without the child conducting but that’s not as fun. If your baby is music lover they’ll enjoy this colorful none water turtle (Do not put in bathtub)

4. Baby Einstein Take along tunes ($7.91) very cheap, simple to use. Classical music. The only thing I don’t like is I wish there was a longer selection of tunes. I also would only recommend this for 3-6 month olds. Once your baby can start picking up and throwing, this item will go flying so keep that in mind, it’s extremely light.

5. V-Tech Sit to stand learning walker ($29.99) after the jumperoo this is one of my favorite toys that Jaden has gotten because it’s full of learning and music. The device sings to you once you turn it on and it gives the children good interaction every time they press something, even when you spin the cogs it makes noise or close the window/door etc. At the time that I got this for my son he was only a sitter and crawler so I haven’t even seen this toys full potential but I read from other parents it is also a great walker when your little one is ready for that.

6. V-Tech playtime bus ($50) for a small bus, this toy is quite pricey however it’s amazing and worth every dollar. It’s very interactive for the babies growing up. It makes fun car noises like (honking, engine noise, the bus driver and the students talk etc) As our children get older this bus will be a very useful learning toy because not only does it sing rhymes, there are numbers and letters to learn from and even a challenge time where it will test the children, for example “can you find the number 3” and the child will have to press that #. Once they get it right, the bus will sound off encouragement and claps. Lastly the bus will go to different stops such as the park, school and the Zoo.

7. Fisher price Laugh and Learn Smart stages puppy ($13.29) a cute cuddly puppy who as you press each button teaches you the alphabet and different parts of the body such as foot, hand, tummy and ears. Again another simple toy which as the babies grow older they will start to learn and remember what they are hearing. The puppy also sing it’s own tunes based on what is pressed.

I hope that parents will find this toy review useful. I can tell you that my son has a fun time playing with all of the above and as he gets smarter he enjoys everything more… in no time he’ll be counting 1-10, and singing his ABC’s.

Christmas time is approaching so why not add a few of these to Santa’s wish list 😉 

BABY LOGIC

1. I love my mom because I know what she smells like.
2. I love my mom because she feeds me.
3. I love my mom because she changes me.
4. Sorry mom, I know you just changed my diaper but I’ve just pooped a really big one.
5. I am going to pick things up and drop them every time you hand it to me.
6. (Unless lucky) I know you take care of me mom but I will most likely be saying “Da da” first.
7. You told me not to go there and touch that! I’m going there and definitely touching that.
8. I will put everything in my teeny tiny mouth because I can mom.
9. I know you’re trying to pull me away from an electric cord because you love me mom and dad but I’m going to cry in your face like you’re mean parents.
10. Thank you mom for making me a fresh bottle of formula but all I want is breastmilk.
11. I know you just fed me but I’m still hungry for whatever you’re having mom.
12. Mommy and Daddy think they are going to have a wonderful sleep, little do they know I’m about to cry for most hours of the night
13. I know you just put on your clothes but I’m about ruin it with spit up in 30 min.

I know this list will get longer and funnier so I’ll definitely have a part two in a few months.

What are some of your own baby logic thoughts? Feel free to let me know and you could be featured on the blog.

Oh when the FIRSTS keep marching in…

There’s nothing like your baby’s first. It’s a feeling of joy and excitement and disbelief. It can also be a feeling of anxiousness and sadness. Every child is different.  They all grow at their own pace, they all explore differently and even though they all go through the same things every single mother has a different story to tell.

In my own experience, my son is quick learner. He’s been widely observant since he was born (something I kept hearing repeatedly from family and strangers) That being said here are some of Jaden’s firsts that have already occurred… The good, The bad, The ugly and how I felt about it as a new mommy. 

 

The good.

– The first time he smiled.Heart melting! yes baby boy it’s mommy and I am not just a dream that you heard from my womb, I am real lol
– The first time he started scooting. With a big smile on my face I’d be saying “Go Jaden, Go Jaden” with clapping to follow. I remember it like yesterday on his colorful word carpet. SIDE NOTE : always encourage your baby. The more they feel you’re rooting for them the more they become confident to keep on trying whatever their new discovery of themselves is.
– This first time he crawled. I think I literally screamed at this point with my eyes wide open again having me shout “Yes, Go, go. You can do it.” He went from scooting on the belly, to one day waking up to himself saying no more belly, knees. I was on the phone with my sister who also witness his brave wobbly self as he was moving step by step and releasing a baby scream. Definitely an exciting evening it was.
– The first time he started eating real food. I was torn with this one because I have been a breast feeder since the start so I felt detachment but little did I know my boobs definitely come in first place with my little man which makes me always think how on earth am I going to ween him off (Another discussion for another day) I believe I made him start with Apple sauce. smooth, sweet and delicious. It wasn’t long until he moved from fruit to veggies and from veggies to wheat & meat. He just loves eating everything for the most part and he must always have what I am having, always. Eating habits are very important from the start because it will literally shape what they eat in the future so keep at mom’s. (This also will be a more in depth topic later)
– The first time he said “Da Da” – not only did I get over hyped about that… once again I was with my sister who witness the brilliance. Despite my own personal emotion I couldn’t help but think my baby is growing too fast. I decided to show Jaden a picture of his daddy and all he kept on doing was laughing and smiling out of nowhere he said “Da da da da” I believe my sister even screamed which startled him and he cried. Oh the memories.
– The first time he started clapping. What got me about this is the fact that he has already started mimicking me and others around him. Like all children it all starts with the popular tune “If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands” who knows if it’s the clapping motions or the catchy song itself but that is another first which has turned into an every day thing.
– The first time he started waving. How?! What do you know about saying hello and bye bye at your small age???? I’m very proud and of course it makes me frown when I leave the room and he cries because he’s not sure if I’m coming back but on the good days when you say “Bye Bye” his little baby wrist goes up and down as he gazes in your eyes with a smile.

The bad.

– The first time I caught him climbing on a table. I didn’t like that one bit because I knew that was going to be the start of “Curious George” & Mr. Curious has you saying “NO. NO. NO” more often than you’d like. Sorry mommies, I’ve learned that somehow it’s just designed this way *shrug*
– TEETHING. Currently my son has two teeth and two quarter teeth at the top. I just love his feature development however the process of getting those teeth makes you want to cry yourself. I am so thankful teething gel and powder exist but there is nothing worse than a non stop crying child at 2am. The crying can be so bad you can even forget what it could be and you start panicking. This happened to papa bear and I. Jaden would cry and scream and kick and shout but there was no fever. We just agreed off to the children’s hospital we go where we can be assisted by professionals. After the crying would calm down and hours of waiting all the doctor said was “He’s teething” I won’t even go into detail about how silly we both felt but instead of talking about it we both would smile at the doctor with our sleepy eyes and said “thank you” and headed back home. ATTENTION MOMMIES : before doctors, make a list of EVERYTHING it could be and try not to be forgetful, it can save a lot of time which I found out the hard way.
– The first time I got slapped in the face because babies think it’s so darn funny but have no idea how painful it is. Now I’ve heard from veteran moms that this is normal behavior but to me, It’s best to stop that right then and there so I tend to say “No hitting Jaden, that’s a no no” he always laughs but eventually he’ll get the message I’ll just have to hang in there a little while longer.

The ugly.

– The first time he got his shots. I think every child handles it differently but my poor Jaden handled it miserably. He was hit with three shots his first time. The cry was so shaky it was like he was telling me “why did you let them do that to me mommy” It was hard for me to deal with and all I could do was console him unfortunately it got worse a few hours later. He ran an extremely high fever and his face was so red. I remember catching a glimpse of his face through the mirror while he was on my shoulder and I burst out in tears myself. I was telling myself “be strong for him” but I just couldn’t bare it and once again this landed me in the children’s hospital where they had to give an IV drip which meant another needle. Thankfully they managed to calm him down and he slept off. It was an extremely tough day I’ll never forget.
– The first fall. Yes, my precious baby has fallen off the bed. I don’t even know how I could let that happen but it happens new moms. I never even sleep that deep but while I was breastfeeding on the edge of the bed somehow we both fell back asleep and next thing I hear BOOM and cry! I woke up so fast. I felt so guilty. My sisters had to console me in the morning & I had to read at least 10 mommy discussions of other mothers having their children fall off the bed or couch to feel better about myself. Luckily Jaden forgave me. It’s the scariest thing but as Jaden’s grandma says : he’s been blessed by a hard surface. So I just took that and ran with it.
– The first time he got burnt. Fast baby, Curious George in the kitchen, hot milk on the counter. It all happen so fast. Just incase you’re wondering my little guy is perfectly well but this was by far the scariest first and God willing the last. He somehow discovered he could reach the very top of the counter by standing on his toes… The milk was close to his finger tips and as I rushed to him the milk poured on my fingers. I didn’t even feel the burn until afterwards because I was so fast in moving him. I Literally threw him under the sink with cold water making sure he was all right and he was and he didn’t even cry that long but… I wasn’t fast enough because the next day I saw he had a milk burn on his right arm. I know terrible things like this can happen and I am just thankful it wasn’t worse. I used Aloe Vera to heal the mark and I must say it was super effective. I’ll definitely have to be more carful next time because it just takes a split second for accidents to happen.

There you have it. The good, The bad and The ugly. First steps are always Important milestones to new mothers and fathers and everyone who is involved in your child’s life. We mommies will go through different firsts at different times and we will have different emotions too. What’s important is that we keep enjoying the journey of our children as they grow older and wiser and superior.