Take back yourself Mama ❤️

This will be my last post having anything to do with our Bali trip and this is a post about me.

While in paradise for a short two weeks, I’ve never felt so good as a mommy. I really felt free and I was loving every bit of my curves and stomach and stretch marks like never before for myself! There’s something about vacations that make you feel more free than ever. Have you noticed that? Have you ever looked at anyone’s vacation pictures and see more of them than usual? It’s because of the freedom and relief to just be away. I love it!!

Remember in my previous blog I said I had a nanny and because of that it helped me “live my best mama life” I mean it. Going on vacation with kids is hardly a break because they will always be just as needy there just as home but I was enjoying myself.

Having two kids. I’m Twenty-nine, my body isn’t like it used to be when I was 18 (flat stomach, no ass, no breast, just lanky and tall) but NOW I have a full woman body. Hips and thighs, stretch marks and a tummy pouch which some days is bigger than others, I still have small breasts (I’ve accepted this fate lol) but yes my body is totally different. When you have children you need to find the balance to take care of them and take care of yourself. It’s not always easy especially when they are newborn but I’m dealing with a 1 1/2 year old and three year old. It’s amazing how much you can do & feel great about it. I feel like I can be super mom and still “slay” on! To feel like this as a mom takes time but I’ve reached that point where I know it’s just going to get better.

You keep yourself sexy and confident for yourself first & then for your husband! When you’re confident in your body, you’re even more attractive because they also see the glow shining within from the outside. I’m so lucky papa bear appreciates my body exactly how it is because I don’t have to hide behind something I am not. I just get to show my sexy on my terms and he enjoys and appreciates that. I pray none of you have to deal with an asshole, who shams you in any type of way as a mother, if they do F THEM 🖕🏼 You are beautiful! You gave life and you are EVERYTHING you are supposed to be.

When you get to the point where you’re ready to take back yourself! Do so without hesitation. We are all adults now. Who the heck is going to tell you anything?! Honestly. Don’t let these kids take over your life to the point where you can’t even feel good about yourself and don’t let them steal your mama shine! You are the maker and creator of them. “Give dem” (as we say in broken English) I know it takes a while to get to this place but YOU WILL AND CAN GET THERE and you’ll love it. Yes, some days or a lot of days you may just want to chill and that’s okay too because that’s life but anytime you want to show out… SHOW ALL THE WAY OUT HONEY 🍯

Keeping the Love alive.

Once you have a baby most of your attention is on your precious new bundle of joy. Of course it is, as a mother you were carrying this child for 9 months. You’ve been through the waddling and the heartburn, all of that including giving birth so at the end when you see that tiny little face it’s like *Deep breath* (I did it!!) Even for fathers, you’ve also been on your toes for 9 months, making sure your child is doing perfectly fine and is eating well and the excitement of just seeing your daughter or son is uncontainable & then you finally do it’s like *Deep breath* (there is my child) for both man and woman it’s just a love that you can not explain.

Putting precious baby to the side, it’s really important we remember our partners. Having a child is a two way street and both parents should always make an effort to keep the romance and spark alive.

I’ve already explained how it takes women sometime because we won’t feel like ourselves right away but even at that, men… you should always support your woman. Tell her she’s beautiful, tell her thank you, give her flowers or give her some foot massages or even run a bath. It’s all about the little gesture that sparks the love. Do anything that makes your woman happy, even if it’s something you don’t like to do, for her just do it because it’ll me a lot & to my women…As the mothers we do have to deal with a lot and we can get tired so quickly but we must also must not forget that our partners need love too and we can contribute to the spark by cooking his favorite meal, back massages, treating him to something he really enjoys doing and anything else that might contribute to happiness. On top of all that don’t neglect the love making. That connection and bond between two is very strong and important. Yes our children are a big distraction but intimacy is necessary. Don’t get so caught up that it forgets to happen because it will cause unnecessary tension. It’s good to release those feelings because after all, we did make a child together so as a couple it’s something to really enjoy.

Now on a truthful note, I know not everyone might not be in a relationship, and that’s perfectly alright. What’s really important is also self love. Whether you’re a single mother or a single father that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t take care of yourself. What makes you happy? What is something you have always wanted to do? Whatever those things are find time to do them. There’s a reason that nannies exist. Even if you feel like I’ve had a child and I feel great but I want to meet somebody new, well alright then spoil yourself and go out on a date… It can be anything, just make sure you don’t loose yourself.

Keeping the love alive can mean different things to all of us but it’s all about taking action and I sincerely believe that if you can keep the flame burning whether big or small everything can be a whole lot more enjoyable. Parenthood won’t be felt as burden but a blessings with amazing perks.

I’d love to read some of your own “spark methods” to keeping the love alive in your home. Feel free to share.